Back to School "Inside Out"

Today, I'll discuss the back to school process from the "Inside Out"- the reference to the Disney/Pixar movie being intentional. As I try to give you some insight on how to partner with teachers this year to get your school year off to a good start, I'll also incorporate links to articles and some of the responses I got from teachers on social media when I asked what they did to help families who might be having a hard time with the transition.

What I loved about "Inside Out" was that it made tangible our emotions- made them cute animated characters in fact- and it showed the important parts they played in the girl's transition to a new school. Not only that, it showed how all of our feelings have value, even ones that are sometimes more difficult to process- like sadness and anxiety. Acknowledging those feelings can be the first step we need to take to process a difficult situation. 

For young children, those difficult feelings can arise upon separation from a parent. This separation anxiety is normal for young children. Little ones' brains are still developing, and regulating their emotions is not something they are necessarily able to do well yet. Part of their development includes learning to deal with separation- trusting the new adult taking care of them, trusting that a parent will return, learning that the feelings they have are ok, learning how to calm down.  

On my son's first day of preschool, he cried. The second day, he cried. By the second week, he finally started to calm down. I followed his teacher's advice to say my goodbyes, reassured him that I would be back, and then let them handle the situation- which was hard to do because I was working in the same building and could hear my son's loud crying from pretty much anywhere. It helped me that I knew and trusted his teacher as a coworker- but that isn't usually the case for families. 

Visiting the school with your young ones before the first day of school is a good way for both of you to warm up to the idea and establish trust. Most schools have "Back to School" nights, but if not, most schools would be happy to accommodate an advance visit or even a "trial" day before the first day of school. Getting through that first week can be tough- but give it a week or so. Expect to have an adjustment period. Make sure to check in with your child's teacher, especially after some time has passed, if your are still concerned with the anxiety. Here are more tips from PBS Parent to help you both adjust.

Early childhood educators are generally well versed in helping families with separation anxiety. I take my hat off to preschool teachers who may need to help several crying children (and parents) adjust. Most of the response I got when I talked to early childhood teachers online involved the importance of communicating with and reassuring parents. Establishing a quick, routine goodbye and using transitional objects were also suggested. (My son had a DIY board book filled with pictures of people who loved him that he kept in his cubby.) Here's a link to more ways teachers can help with separation anxiety.

I don't always do this on my blog, but I want to tell you about a couple of resources I have for parents experiencing separation anxiety with their children. One is a book you can color together- your child could then use it as a transitional object. It has a place for pictures of the two of you together at the end. You can listen to the music that goes with the book here. Another is my song "Heart, Pencils, and Crayons." This might be a good one if you are a parent that likes to leave love notes in lunch boxes. You could use the song to help start a conversation about how separation will occur, but that the notes will help remind your child that you love them and will be back to pick them up. You might even talk about how they could draw pictures or write notes for you in school. Check out the video of the song below. See you next week for my suggestions on creative ways to help your child learn to read!

Self Care for Parents of Young Children

I'm writing this article today as an advocate for new parents. I know how hard it can be- I became a single parent when my son was just about a year old, and I struggled with health issues throughout his early childhood. However, I persevered and got through it with a little help from my friends, family, and doctors- all of whom helped me care for myself as much as I did my son.

I know that self care can be elusive in the midst of caring for a young child. Being a parent can be very demanding of our time, energy, and patience, and can seem like there is no time left for anything else. It's pretty crucial that we do take some time for self care, however- we're able to do much more as parents if we aren't constantly fatigued or sick. Here are some ways to incorporate self care in your busy schedule.

Early Bedtime- For them, not you. My son was in bed from 7-8pm each day. (He also woke up at 7am each day). Having that time at night to myself was really what kept me going the most. This was the time I had to catch up on the things I wasn't able to get to during the day, as well as to relax a bit- finally.

Exercise- This is something you can definitely incorporate during the day- I used to walk or hike with my son (in a stroller or carrier- or with him toddling along) daily. Another way you could do this is find a gym with a childcare room. This might be difficult if your young one gets upset separating from you, however.

Find your community- If you can help it at all, try not to be alone with your kids all day. Everyone needs help from time to time, whether it's with childcare or with moral support- both are pretty important. Social media can be good for moral support, but it really can't take the place of spending time with other people in person. There are lots of ways to do this- for us it was playgroups, moving closer to family, being a part of an early childhood education community, and getting out to activities and places for young ones as much as possible.

Find a confidant- Please also don't hesitate to set up counseling for yourself- no matter what your income level is, there is always a trained professional to talk to. This can often be a better option than talking to family or friends. It's just the way our brain works- it often takes an objective person to be the sounding board we need to move past what may be in the way of our ability to be at peace with ourselves. It goes without saying that we are then able to pass on that inner peace to our children. Call 211 or visit 211.org to find counseling services near you.

Do what you enjoy- Take that precious time you have to yourself to treat yourself. Nuff said!

Hopefully this article, if not offering you new information, will inspire you to be sure to incorporate some time for self care daily. I need to remind myself of that as well! Here in Maryland, school starts the day after Labor Day. Even though my son will be turning 10 this year, our summers have been much like that time when he was very young and we spent every day together. However, I'll be going back to school soon to get ready for a new year, and so will my son! Next week, I'll give you a little insight about being a teacher and how you can work with your child's teacher to make the most of their time at school this year. Stay tuned!

The Dog Days of Summer- With Young Children

You've spent lots of quality time with your youngster this summer already- lots and lots- and there are still three weeks until school starts again? Welcome to the dog days of summer with a young child! Today's article is about what to do when it seems like your kiddos are too hot, bored, or (insert descriptor here), to make it through the day as happy campers. You both need to stay occupied, a change of scene, or perhaps both, to make it through the next few weeks. Here are a few things to try!

Take a hike- The forest has a magic way of calming down even the most restless of us- there is now even a big thing about tree therapy going around the internet. It has worked like a charm for my son and I- we go in a bit cranky, then we leave relaxed. Make sure to check the difficulty of the trails you use before you go- keep it to easy if you are a beginner or will be baby wearing.

Think cool- This may seem like a no brainer, but we've all been stuck in heat for too long (even if it was our own idea) and suffered the effects. A hot toddler at the zoo, amusement park, or even the beach- is a sad toddler. Dog days are a good time to avoid being outside during the hottest part of the day (the afternoon) or if the air quality is bad (code red). It might seem cliche, but let's just go over all our "cool" options- air conditioning, ice cream, popsicles, lemonade, water play. You get the idea.

Find your Zen- Being inside is the cool choice in the dog days, but the same old indoor activities can be difficult for young children who need constant monitoring. Be prepared- keep your home stocked with toys, books, art supplies, calming music, and movies. Come up with a list of places to go, friends/family to visit, and things you could do and stick to it. This is your mantra. When in doubt-

Go for a Drive- If you haven't tried this mom trick before, this may be the time to start! The drive itself can help calm the kids down- then you are suddenly somewhere different, and that could play to your favor as well. Even if you just go to the grocery store, on a dog day it could be the highlight of the day if you leave with ice cream.

One last recommendation for the dog days is to let yourself be aimless for a little while. No need to make an agenda or to try to squeeze in one more trip for the summer. Focus on getting through the day relatively unscathed. Definitely make time for self care as well- more on that topic next week! Stay tuned!

Early Language Learning- Part III

Today I'll conclude my writing about learning language, especially a second language, in early childhood. I've already written about how we learn language in our early years, and some research about the benefits of learning a second language (see my two previous blog entries to read up on those topics), so today I'll recommend resources and programs to accomplish this goal with your tot.  I'll give a brief summary- each title links to more information as well.

Berlitz- This is the company that publishes all those second language dictionaries you had to buy for your foreign language classes. They are an older company, and offer conversational classes in multiple languages nationally for kids and teens.

Little Pim- This early language program is designed with your little ones in mind. It covers multiple languages, including ESL- the only drawback I see is that it's all video based with some supplementary lessons and activities.

Muzzy- Parents might remember Muzzy from learning a second language in school. After checking out the website, I was impressed with the extensive lesson plans and learning materials you could get to supplement this video-based series. Muzzy also emphasizes and includes learning songs.

Language Tree- This program is the last video based program I'll recommend looking into. The types of videos include live action and nature (as opposed to animated), so that may be a plus depending on what you are looking for.

Private Lessons- If your family is serious about learning a second language, you may want to invest in a private teacher for you and your little one. Similar to hiring someone to help you learn to play a musical instrument, you'll get individualized attention and a live person to talk to. You may end up using the programs listed above (such as Muzzy), except with someone already fluent in the language, someone who could help you accomplish the supplemental lessons.

Music based programs- If you've been following my blog, you know that I stress the benefits of music in early childhood education often. I have quite a list of musician friends and acquaintances who have online content, and perform or teach as well. Please check them out!
Canta y Baila Conmigo
Cantale a Tu Bebe
Moozica
Moo Moo Muzica
Musica Lingua
Mi Amigo Hamlet
123 Andres
Mister G
Alina Celeste
Jose Luiz Orozco
Nathalia
Sonia De Los Santos
Flor Bromley
Mama Lisa

Remember learning a language often requires immersion. Young children learn language in fun, social settings- and it doesn't happen overnight. A combination of practice, persistence, and continuity should lead to lasting results. Good luck, and have fun! For next week's blog, I'll write about what you can do with your kids in the late summer. Any parent of children who don't attend a school program during the summer will know what I'm talking about. What can you do after you've already done the usual summer things (vacation, camp, day trips)- to keep your children busy (and yourself sane)? My recommendations will all be low cost to free as well. Stay tuned!